Jack can't tell the difference between Dani and me. Even though she is 9 months pregnant, he still walks into a room and asks if she is me or not. I tried to remind him that she was pregnant and I didn't have a big belly (first time in my life Dani's belly was bigger then mine!). He looked at me like I was crazy. I suddenly realized how great a gift it was that he had no concept at all about body images. He didn't pay attention to her growing belly, or my lack there of. How cool is that???
Zack took a test to try to help him hone in on what his perfect career path would be, so that he can know how to take the necessary steps to get there. The first question was where do you see yourself in 5 years. Zack's response..."Looking out a window at work, thinking about Ana and Jack." I burst out laughing when he told me because his answer is so him, and so true. At least two years at Harvard might help him get a bigger window to look out of!
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Apple Picking in Massachusetts
This morning after tucking our flu ridden Zack into bed, stocking the fridge with Gatorade, juice, three kinds of soup, medicine and tissues galore Jack and I set out to go apple picking. We drove about 40 minutes to Acton. It was a beautiful ride, and made me fully repentant of my previous, "what's with all the freaking trees" comment I made upon arrival in Boston.
Jack and I had a great time picking apples, eating apple doughnuts, drinking apple cider, getting lost in the hay maze and bouncing in the bounce house. The only thing missing from our day was Zack.
Jack picked this apple off a tree and came over and told me that there was a picture of an apple on his apple. He insisted, and rightfully so, that it deserved photographic documentation.
**We are not heartless leaving Zack here alone. We were meeting friends, and knew that Zack would be asleep most of the day. I also figured it was better that we get out of our germ box apartment so Jack and I don't get sick and make Zack feel worse.
Jack and I had a great time picking apples, eating apple doughnuts, drinking apple cider, getting lost in the hay maze and bouncing in the bounce house. The only thing missing from our day was Zack.
Jack picked this apple off a tree and came over and told me that there was a picture of an apple on his apple. He insisted, and rightfully so, that it deserved photographic documentation.
**We are not heartless leaving Zack here alone. We were meeting friends, and knew that Zack would be asleep most of the day. I also figured it was better that we get out of our germ box apartment so Jack and I don't get sick and make Zack feel worse.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Closing a chapter
Sometime back in January when I realized that my due date and Dani's due dates were four days apart from one another I told Zack that if by some miracle of miracles he got into Harvard, I wasn't going. He'd have to defer for a year. Just one year, so that I could see my sister become a mom. Just one year. Anyone who knows how much Zack loves me, knows he agreed. The heartbeat was strong, and my chance of miscarriage went down to less then 3%. And then my doctor agreed to run just one more ultrasound for me, thinking it would calm my worries, and I lay there looking at the ultrasound screen where the little blinking light which was my child was gone.
We found out that Zack got into Harvard the same week that Dani found out she was having a girl.
I remember the nights last year that I spent crying, yelling, and not understanding why I had been forced to endure yet another missing blinking light. I spent last year undergoing every hideous fertility test known to man. I was so preoccupied with trying to have another child, not just for me, but for my family, that I missed out on enjoying too many precious moments with my family. I ingested unnecessary hormones prescribed by stymied doctors, shot my body up continually with rat pregnancy hormones and made myself crazy. It's one thing to take progesterone, or clomid if your body has a progesterone deficiency or does not ovulate, but to my body, working perfectly normally, it was torture.
Fine, I decided, so I lost that pregnancy, but by golly I wasn't going to go to Harvard and not be pregnant. So I pushed us further and got on even more medications, had even more awful procedures, and started along the road towards in vitro. I figured if Heavenly Father wasn't stepping in - I sure as heck would.
Everything was prepared, appointments made, medications started and I couldn't stop crying. I couldn't stop feeling like somewhere along the way I had steered us off course. I looked at my beautiful, hilarious, quirky, fun loving, mirror of Zack and me child and was overcome with gratitude. Gratitude and knowledge that he came here at the right time.
And I called it all off.
Quit taking all 9 of my medications, canceled my appointments and notified my doctors. I finally made my peace (okay maybe its something I will always have to actively work at) that I will only have one child during my lifetime. That being true, I didn't want to waste another single day hyped up on fertility hormones. I wanted to enjoy my three and a half year old every minute that I get to have a three and a half year old.
And I am at peace.
I have learned enough to know that I am not in charge and I can't force the Lord's timing or His hand. (Oh how I wish I could have learned this lesson an easier way) I know my small, but incredible family is meant to be here in Boston at this time, and that maybe, years from now, I will understand why. But until then, I will try my best to make every day the best day of my life.
We found out that Zack got into Harvard the same week that Dani found out she was having a girl.
I remember the nights last year that I spent crying, yelling, and not understanding why I had been forced to endure yet another missing blinking light. I spent last year undergoing every hideous fertility test known to man. I was so preoccupied with trying to have another child, not just for me, but for my family, that I missed out on enjoying too many precious moments with my family. I ingested unnecessary hormones prescribed by stymied doctors, shot my body up continually with rat pregnancy hormones and made myself crazy. It's one thing to take progesterone, or clomid if your body has a progesterone deficiency or does not ovulate, but to my body, working perfectly normally, it was torture.
Fine, I decided, so I lost that pregnancy, but by golly I wasn't going to go to Harvard and not be pregnant. So I pushed us further and got on even more medications, had even more awful procedures, and started along the road towards in vitro. I figured if Heavenly Father wasn't stepping in - I sure as heck would.
Everything was prepared, appointments made, medications started and I couldn't stop crying. I couldn't stop feeling like somewhere along the way I had steered us off course. I looked at my beautiful, hilarious, quirky, fun loving, mirror of Zack and me child and was overcome with gratitude. Gratitude and knowledge that he came here at the right time.
And I called it all off.
Quit taking all 9 of my medications, canceled my appointments and notified my doctors. I finally made my peace (okay maybe its something I will always have to actively work at) that I will only have one child during my lifetime. That being true, I didn't want to waste another single day hyped up on fertility hormones. I wanted to enjoy my three and a half year old every minute that I get to have a three and a half year old.
And I am at peace.
I have learned enough to know that I am not in charge and I can't force the Lord's timing or His hand. (Oh how I wish I could have learned this lesson an easier way) I know my small, but incredible family is meant to be here in Boston at this time, and that maybe, years from now, I will understand why. But until then, I will try my best to make every day the best day of my life.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
At long last...
Our camera decided it was done with Boston for a while and took a much needed vacation to Long Island tucked away in our dear friends' stroller. At long last it has returned to us. I can no longer use my missing camera as an excuse to put off recording all that needs to be recorded of our time in Boston.
We collected our keys
Welcome to Soldiers Field Park!
These guys keep me smiling
My kitchen
I miss my big kitchen in San Diego and my gigantic island. I had so much room to cook and bake. Our kitchen is so small that we can't open the dishwasher all the way. It can only open to a 45 degree angle because it hits the fridge.
Jack's room
I'm in love with the view out his window. Jack and I sometimes lie together in his bed reading books and watching the giant oak tree as it's leaves start to turn yellow and red.
Our living room/dining room/office
The view from our balcony
It's a bit hard to make out in this picture, but we do have a view of the Charles River right on the other side of this street. We can sit in our living room/dining room/office and watch the crew teams practice.
The park and field practically steps from our apartment
Our new car
Zack gets a kick out of the fact that when we are all sitting down for dinner, my chair is in both the dinning room and the kitchen. Conveniently, I can reach over and get spare napkins from the drawer without leaving the comfort of my chair at the table.
Jack has heard Zack and me comment on the fragrance of our apartment so many times that now he walks into our home and says, "huh, it sure does smell like curry in here." I don't even think the child has any idea what curry even is!
I am at times overcome walking around with how beautiful it is here and that I get to spend two years of my life living at Harvard. Don't I make it sound inviting? Now don't all of my dear friends and loved ones want to move here to be with us????
So much newness. More to come...
We collected our keys
Welcome to Soldiers Field Park!
These guys keep me smiling
My kitchen
I miss my big kitchen in San Diego and my gigantic island. I had so much room to cook and bake. Our kitchen is so small that we can't open the dishwasher all the way. It can only open to a 45 degree angle because it hits the fridge.
Jack's room
I'm in love with the view out his window. Jack and I sometimes lie together in his bed reading books and watching the giant oak tree as it's leaves start to turn yellow and red.
Our living room/dining room/office
The view from our balcony
It's a bit hard to make out in this picture, but we do have a view of the Charles River right on the other side of this street. We can sit in our living room/dining room/office and watch the crew teams practice.
The park and field practically steps from our apartment
Our new car
Zack gets a kick out of the fact that when we are all sitting down for dinner, my chair is in both the dinning room and the kitchen. Conveniently, I can reach over and get spare napkins from the drawer without leaving the comfort of my chair at the table.
Jack has heard Zack and me comment on the fragrance of our apartment so many times that now he walks into our home and says, "huh, it sure does smell like curry in here." I don't even think the child has any idea what curry even is!
I am at times overcome walking around with how beautiful it is here and that I get to spend two years of my life living at Harvard. Don't I make it sound inviting? Now don't all of my dear friends and loved ones want to move here to be with us????
So much newness. More to come...
Monday, August 31, 2009
The longest post ever
This Summer has past in a whirlwind of visitors and activity. The summer started with the arrival of our visitors from Tahiti. Amiria came out to live with us for seven weeks to complete an internship, and Maima came out, well, to shop! :) Here is a recap of our summer fun.
We introduced them to Fish tacos
They tried to introduce me to fish, Tahiti style...
We introduced them to American barbeques, and Smores.
Rachel and her friends joined us for the "Base Tan" Weekend. The weather didn't permit much tanning, but we loved having them around.
Zack picked up two bikes off freecycle to help Amiria get to work and back.
We shopped...
and shopped...
and shopped...
and shopped...
then we thought we'd do some more shopping...
Maima fell in love with Ross. We no exaggeration probably spent at least 6 hours in Rosses all over town that week.
We introduced them to the joys of In-n-out
...and froze them at Southern California beaches
Ate coma inducing nutella and banana crepes, loaded with so much butter and sugar that y body had no other choice but to go to sleep and allow it to concentrate solely on digesting and not contracting diabetes.
Had to pick up Amiria on several occasions all over town when she got lost attempting to ride her bike home. The first night she rode her bike, she left work at 4 and waited until 7 when we called wondering where she was to admit she was lost.
We said our goodbyes to Maima and dropped her off at LAX with 4 massive boxes stuffed with all the spoils of our many, many, many days of shopping. Besides one cold 20 minute trip to the beach, Maima only saw the inside of stores in San Diego. She couldn't have been happier.
We said our hellos to the Earnest cousins and Annee fresh from Korea. George claims the only thing he likes about Korea is the cheap dvds. :)
We played at Sea World
Sent Amiria down her first real roller coaster ride. George and Henry had fun too...
Reconnected with old friends from Santa Clara in Oceanside
Went to the Zackrison beach week which despite my evident lack of photo documentation was full of beach days, yummy food, family home evenings, movies, cousins, sand and tons of fun. Jack cried so hard when he had to say goodbye to his cousins. We sent Amiria to Utah and Idaho with her new friend Kristen for a week. While we were gone Zack's cousin and aunt and three kids came to San Diego and used out house as a landing spot. (less you think our poor home might have gone unoccupied this summer!)
Two days after beach week, our dear friends from New York came out for a visit along with their three kids. Zack and I have a theory that having friends makes us fatter. I was 4 pounds heavier when their week trip was over thanks to two birthday cakes, decadent chocolate crossaints, an extravagent nearly $400 French meal out for the adults, and theme park goodies.
We played at Disneyland
**Monica, I can't wear my headband without thinking of you now... :)
Jack was reunited with Autopia
My 29th !!! birthday cake arrived from LA
We stuck candles in it, made a wish and ate it anyways...
Put our cars up for sale
We sold Zack's and totalled mine (opps)
We opened our home up for staging and realtors of San Diego to help our landlords sell the house from afar.
We played in the pool (lots)
Made repeat visits to SeaWorld, the Del Mar Fair, and the SD Zoo on Amiria's farewell tour. And the back to SeaWorld for fireworks with Jen, Anthony and Emily. Too bad they didn't start till 10pm!
Then we packed up our home, said "till we meet agains" to our friends and loved ones and moved to Boston.
The end.
We introduced them to Fish tacos
They tried to introduce me to fish, Tahiti style...
We introduced them to American barbeques, and Smores.
Rachel and her friends joined us for the "Base Tan" Weekend. The weather didn't permit much tanning, but we loved having them around.
Zack picked up two bikes off freecycle to help Amiria get to work and back.
We shopped...
and shopped...
and shopped...
and shopped...
then we thought we'd do some more shopping...
Maima fell in love with Ross. We no exaggeration probably spent at least 6 hours in Rosses all over town that week.
We introduced them to the joys of In-n-out
...and froze them at Southern California beaches
Ate coma inducing nutella and banana crepes, loaded with so much butter and sugar that y body had no other choice but to go to sleep and allow it to concentrate solely on digesting and not contracting diabetes.
Had to pick up Amiria on several occasions all over town when she got lost attempting to ride her bike home. The first night she rode her bike, she left work at 4 and waited until 7 when we called wondering where she was to admit she was lost.
We said our goodbyes to Maima and dropped her off at LAX with 4 massive boxes stuffed with all the spoils of our many, many, many days of shopping. Besides one cold 20 minute trip to the beach, Maima only saw the inside of stores in San Diego. She couldn't have been happier.
We said our hellos to the Earnest cousins and Annee fresh from Korea. George claims the only thing he likes about Korea is the cheap dvds. :)
We played at Sea World
Sent Amiria down her first real roller coaster ride. George and Henry had fun too...
Reconnected with old friends from Santa Clara in Oceanside
Went to the Zackrison beach week which despite my evident lack of photo documentation was full of beach days, yummy food, family home evenings, movies, cousins, sand and tons of fun. Jack cried so hard when he had to say goodbye to his cousins. We sent Amiria to Utah and Idaho with her new friend Kristen for a week. While we were gone Zack's cousin and aunt and three kids came to San Diego and used out house as a landing spot. (less you think our poor home might have gone unoccupied this summer!)
Two days after beach week, our dear friends from New York came out for a visit along with their three kids. Zack and I have a theory that having friends makes us fatter. I was 4 pounds heavier when their week trip was over thanks to two birthday cakes, decadent chocolate crossaints, an extravagent nearly $400 French meal out for the adults, and theme park goodies.
We played at Disneyland
**Monica, I can't wear my headband without thinking of you now... :)
Jack was reunited with Autopia
My 29th !!! birthday cake arrived from LA
We stuck candles in it, made a wish and ate it anyways...
Put our cars up for sale
We sold Zack's and totalled mine (opps)
We opened our home up for staging and realtors of San Diego to help our landlords sell the house from afar.
We played in the pool (lots)
Made repeat visits to SeaWorld, the Del Mar Fair, and the SD Zoo on Amiria's farewell tour. And the back to SeaWorld for fireworks with Jen, Anthony and Emily. Too bad they didn't start till 10pm!
Then we packed up our home, said "till we meet agains" to our friends and loved ones and moved to Boston.
The end.
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