Our new Home

We spent the last week down (See Zack I'm trying) in San Diego on a home finding tour. We had a wonderful hotel in La Jolla that was pretty much bigger then our apartment which we made our home base. Intuit provided us with an awesome Realtor, Lauren, who spent all day Tuesday with us. The day started at 8:30 and Jack, who we had just that morning admitted that our new home was not going to next door to Dani and Sean, was none to pleased. We must have seen 15-17 places that first day, and the first 10 or so Jack loudly announced that he did not like them and did not want to live there. Finally, we found a wonderful little community. As soon as we drove down the street I knew it was where I wanted to live. It is lined with cute little trees, has basketball courts, a swimming pool, tons of grassy fields and two little parks and playgrounds in the immediate community.

We found two houses that we were considering. One that had a great back yard with an outdoor fireplace, waterfall, fish pond with lily pads and real live grass. This was almost our home, until we found out that the owners were moving their kids to Switzerland for 2 years and wanted their home to be left exactly the way they had it so that it would be the same for when their kids came home. That meant, all the walls had to stay painted the colors they choose (which were all nice colors for the most part except for a seriously awful magenta bathroom) and the bamboo that lined the bottom half of one room could not be removed. We quickly realized, that although it was our favorite place thus far because it felt like a home, it in the end wasn't our home and we didn't want to live in someone elses' home.

So we settled on a three bedroom house one block over. It does not have a yard, which is sad, but it does have a large patio area (perfect for Jack's basketball hoop, large beetle, table and chairs, bike, beep-beep and homeless man shopping cart), hard wood floors downstairs, and enough room for Jack to grow more then 3 feet tall. :)

Here are some pictures...









The only sad part is that the kitchen counters are not a very pretty color as the picture shows. If you want to see more, you'll have to come visit us...

I am most happy about not having to walk up three flights of stairs. More accurately, I am most excited about not having to drag Jack up three flights of stairs. Although visitors will have to park on the street and climb a few stairs, our garage is in the back of the house. Hurray!

Come visit us. Please?


**While we were in the area, we drove up to meet Tai and Baba for lunch in Irvine, and then drove a bit further to visit with Rachel in Newport.




**On a sad personal note. I remembered how San Diego's proximity to the beach and my hair don't mix on this trip. Hopefully they will find a way to coexist.

Home Sweet Home

We found a new home. More info and pictures to come as soon as we come up for air...

Brown Shorts Month

Jack has been wearing this pair of brown shorts every day for like two weeks. I got tired of the rolling around on the ground tantrums at the idea that, heaven forbid he put on a different pair that morning, and decided to pick my battles and let it officially be brown shorts month. Finally, a few days ago, I asked Jack why he loved his brown shorts so much? He told me that brown was Poppi's (Sean's) favorite color. Needless to say, my heart was softened towards those brown shorts.

In-n-Out and Aunt Sarah

We had a fun, but quick visit with Aunt Sarah when she came down to Mountain View last week for an interview. What could be better then hanging out with family, eating burgers, fries and milkshakes, and getting a super cool hat to wear!

Out of Town

We are headed down to San Diego tomorrow for the week in hopes that we will find our new home.
Wish us luck!!

Happy 6 Year Anniversary

Today is our 6 year anniversary. It have gone by so quickly, but at the same time, we have loved one another since we were 16 and truly feel like we have grown up together. This weekend, we took a drive up to Monterey (sans Jack) and stayed at the Tickle Pink Inn. Our room was seriously bigger then our apartment and one side lined with floor to ceiling windows of an beautiful ocean view. It was our first night away from Jack (thank you to Dani and Sean who did an awesome job taking care of Jack, and didn't hang up on me when I repeatedly reminded them not to lose him).

Zack and I had an amazing dinner at the Pacific Edge restaurant and managed to spend over $200 before tip on our meal. It was all delicious! This morning we woke up on our own, and had an hour long couples Swedish massage in our room. After a quick stop off at the outlets, we made our way home to a very happy, not lost Jack.

Happy happy anniversary Zack! You have made my life.

Here are a few pictures from our celebration!
Picture from our balcony



Dinner at the Pacific Edge

The end of an era

Hi friends, it's Zack. I'm posting about a sad occasion in my life, I no longer have a monopoly on licking the beaters and spatulas in the house. Jack has discovered these sweet delights.

on the bright side, at least we share this common interest!

Cool Guy PJS

I love buying Jack pjs. It is perhaps the clothes item I get the most joy out of buying since boy clothes are a bit boring most of the time. That being said, Jack has at least 15 pair of pjs in his drawer. However, since we got the "cool guy pjs" from Oliver and Brenden, Jack will not wear anything else to bed. Occasionally I put my foot down and insist they get washed and he is forced to wear something else to bed for one night, but most often this is the desired night time look:



The boxers have to be pulled way up high and folded over so they don't drag. So, thank you to the Wiley's, without who this look day in and day out would not be possible, and Jack would definitely not think he was as cool as he does now!

Blogging Break

Zack asked me to either "blog responsibly" or take a break from blogging about his work situation until negotiations were finished. I didn't know if I could be trusted to "blog responsibly" so I opted to remain silent on the matter. I am HAPPY (see it just took a few days) to confirm that Zack has accepted a fantastic offer and will be working in the San Diego office. He technically starts his new job on Monday, but will be working from Mountain View until we move, which will probably be mid September. Along with his new job came a great moving package which includes professional packers and movers. It feels weird to not be stressing about packing up, but I am using the time to sort through things and throw things out while Zack is at work thanks to Annee's helpful suggestions.

We are breaking the news to Jack slowly. He was very concerned when the idea of getting a new home first was broached. His main concern was what was going to happen to all of his toys. Once we reassured him that his toys were coming too, he agreed to the move. I think I am most excited about the limited time remaining that I have to coerce, persuade, demand, and carry Jack up 3 flights of stairs with no elevator. So Yeah for Zack! Yeah for our family! Yeah for San Diego! Yeah for a larger place (hopefully)! And triple Yeahs for a better job for Zack (or for that matter any job for Zack!!)

**On a side note, I just today realized that slide.com was putting music on our blog. My volume is usually turned off, so I had no idea. I'm not sure that I like that...

Quirky things about Jack I want to remember

He insists on kissing my toes before he goes to bed. Eww, and I have no idea where that one cam from.

Today Adda told him he was like a sponge. Jack corrected her and told her no, he was a wash cloth.

Jack wants to brush his teeth so they won't be green like the Hulks.

Jack begs us not to eat Cherrios each morning because "it will smell like Cherrios." He asks me to eat them a few steps away from him. Weird.

Jack told us today that everyone has an Adda. Oh, how I wish everyone had an Adda. The world would be a happier, more wonderful place.

Gilroy Gardens

Last week after my kickboxing class, we decided to be spontaneous, skip naptime and drive down to Gilroy Gardens to check it out. I had heard good things from some friends and it did not disappoint. The whole place is geared to kids Jack's age (well all but two rides). He LOVED it! He got to ride on the carousel, fire truck ride, race car ride, balloon ride (that went soooo fast and he wasn't scared at all), run through the waterfalls and fountains, ride the train, drive the cool car, and eat a churro. There were a few lines, but Jack handled them like a pro. He didn't complain once in line, maybe because it was such a new experience, or maybe because he was so jazzed that he got to go on all the "big kid" rides.

One moment I want to remember is when we put Jack on the carousel we were told no parents were allowed. It was Jack's first time on a ride without one of us, so I was clapping and dancing about (I know...just picture the spectacle) and cheering for my big boy before the ride started to try to boost his confidence. At which point I swear Jack looked so embarrassed and looked away! Oh, could it be starting this early????

San Jose Children's Discovery Museum

Despite the fact that the new job and upcoming move to San Diego appear to be occupying us fully, we are still managing to enjoy our days with good friends and family. Here are a few pictures from our trip to the Discovery Museum last week. We used to have an annual pass here, but the excessive amounts of kids not well monitored on field trips pushing my one year old out of their way totally turned me off. I was pleasantly surprised to find the museum nearly field trip free!! We had a blast!

I've always said, if he interviews he'll get it...

I have been psyching myself out, totally convinced Zack didn't get the job and feeling sorry for him. The job is his (YEAH for Zack!!) and now I'm feeling sorry for myself. Well not really sorry, just scared. If he didn't get the job it would have felt like we were spending the next year just treading water. It feels like a great opportunity for Zack's career, and honestly for our life. So, I guess, San Diego here we come! Ugh.

Hearing Good Things

So, Zack's interviews went really really well. He will hear for sure on Tuesday, but the recruiter emailed him today to tell him that she has been hearing really good things about him around the office but they will tell him officially Tuesday. Ugh. He is really excited about the job...in fact as far as jobs go, it's pretty much perfect for him. It's all about being an idea guy. He will be working to come up with new business ideas for Intuit. It's cheaper to live in San Diego. Ugh. It's nicer then up here. Ugh. We only wanted to be here for another year anyways. Ugh. It's not Korea :). We will have to leave Dani, the home we brought Jack home to, the place that has been home for half of our marriage (longer then anywhere else), the friends that we have made, the three parks all within walking distance, my trusted friend the alarm system, oh and did I mention Dani? Ugh. Not fun. If only I could say it didn't feel right. Ugh. Ugh. And did I mention Ugh.

August 25 is right around the corner

I'm not sure who is keeping track of the fact that August 25th (Zack's official layoff date) is just around the corner. First off, Zack has received a promotion !! YEAH !! which deserves to be celebrated despite being laid off. So Saturday night I am taking him to Scott's Seafood up in Palo Alto which he has been hinting ever so casually about wanting to try out. Secondly, Zack has 3 solid job offers, all as a Marketing Manager in the Mountain View office. All three are waiting on his decision in the next few weeks to come. Thirdly, Zack is now on a plane to San Diego to interview for another job he is interested in...dare I admit it's his first choice, which is super scary for those of us who don't like change even if it's good change. We will keep everyone in the loop as the deadline gets even closer...

Moments continued

I can pretty much get Jack to help with anything by telling him it's going to make Zack happy. Last night he helped me get dinner ready and kept saying over and over with such sweet enthusiasm, "Momma, Papa is going to be so happy!"

Last Saturday Zack gave me the day off for some me time. When I got home to my boys, Zack told me that at one point in the day Jack looked over at him and said, "Papa, how come Momma doesn't make messes when she does this?" Yes, how come indeed. To his credit, all the messes were cleaned up before I got home.

Zack has brought out his two remote control cars that he built when he was a teenager. If Jack didn't think he had the coolest Papa in the world already, this solidified it. Most nights you can find us at the school racing the cars. Zack has explained all about how cars work, and now Jack is obsessed with "bustion engines" (combustion engines).

Kiddie Pool

Jack and I were invited over to a friend's pool today. It's a great set up because there is a pool, a hot tub and a kiddie pool. I was telling Jack how much fun we were going to have at the kiddie pool yesterday. A few hours later he came to me and said,
"Momma, I don't want to go to the doggie pool"
It took a few seconds, but turns out he was hearing "kitty pool" which quickly translated to "doggie pool" in his head. :)

Visiting with Grandma

This past week my mom was in town which pretty much translates to a parenting Sabbatical for Zack and me. Jack totally loves her and asks politely if Zack and I will leave the room so he can have her all to himself. Grandma's visits always include donuts, parks, visits to the bagel store, sandcastles, playing cars, and whatever new thing Jack is into. This time the trip included a stop off at our local bowling alley and Jack's first Mini golf experience. Here are some sweet pictures from the week.

Ilich Beach Week 08

Despite the trip beginning with tears, we had a wonderful time at Ilich Beach Week 08! Jack quickly remembered that although he was suddenly cousin-less, he was surrounded by adults who were ga-ga for him. Some of my sweetest memories are of watching him with Baba and Deda. Baba wanted nothing more then to get to sit and cuddle with him on the big pillow...and finally the big moment happened and it was priceless to see! Jack decided it would be funny if he called Deda "donut" and so "donut" he became! The week included lots of well deserved surfing for Zack and Sean (and Jack too), long walks to the park, donuts, bowling, bike riding with Baba, Jack playing in Grandma Kari's BMV and asking to open the hood to inspect the engine, dinner at Dukes for Zack and me, Baba hating every show we watched, Tablici, and an introduction to chavut cici for Zack and Sean.

We had an easy drive home, until 30 minutes from home Jack threw up. Thankfully the clothes that Sarah donated were right on top in the trunk and Jack was thrilled to get to wear an over-sized Cars shirt and boxers. By the time we got home Jack had a 104.5 degree fever. The mysterious illness left as quickly as it came, and by the next morning he showed no sign of ever having been sick. He did however spend the next week insisting on wearing Brenden and Oliver's large shirts and no pants and kept telling me how cool he looked. :)

Zackrison Beach Week 08

A few weeks ago we spent a week+ down in San Juan Capistrano for the Zackrison Beach Week 08. The house was fantastic and right on the beach which made for a lot of beach and water time! Jack loved getting to be one of the gang and got a real kick out of hanging out with his cousins. When we were driving away the last day and he realized his cousins weren't going to be at the new beach house he started crying. He was so sad to be leaving them! Then he asked if Zack's cousins (sisters and brother) were going to be at the new house and cried again when he was told they had to go home with their kids.

Some highlights include...
*Jack pushing Zack and me up on the beach and saying "You two stay here, I'm going in the waves"
*Oliver teaching Jack how to pull his shirt over his head
*Finding Jack along the back side of the house. When I asked him what he was doing, he told me he was hiding from Baby June so he could eat his Fruit Loops
*Grandma and Grandpa Z finally arriving to join in the fun
*waving to Jack on the train with all his cousins and Grandma and Grandpa Z
*playing card games once the kids went to sleep
*Mei Li getting locked in my car (on my watch...yikes!!!!)
*Jack deciding thumbs up didn't express how awesome things were, so he decided that he needed to use his thumb and his pointer finger in the shape of an "L" and went around doing it and saying "Cool dude!"
*Taking Jack to his first movie. He was so excited about popcorn, but didn't make it through the opening credits because he was so overwhelmed and scared of the noise and hugeness of it all...
*tons of quiet down time with family and loved ones!

Moments

A moment I don't want to forget...

Jack gently grabbed my face and turned it to face him one day after bowling and said, "Momma, do you know that I like you and I'm having fun with you?"
Sweet, sweet boy.

The Apple doesn't Fall Far

I do not [HEART] hiking. Seriously.

For anyone who has spent any real time with me, that statement shouldn't come as a shock. As a kid, I had to be enticed up the mountain with the promise of "chocolate chip" cookies (only once I had made it to the top of the mountain did I realize I had been duped and they were raisin cookies which everyone knows are never ever good enough to climb an entire mountain for!).

Fast forward to today. Some good friends invited Jack and I to go to San Antonio Open Space Park. Since we really didn't have anything better to do (READ we postponed bowling till Wednesday) we decided to go. It wasn't until we got there that I realized pretty much the entire activity was a nature walk. Nature walks are too close a cousin to hikes for me generally, but the company was fantastic and I was actually happy to be there. Jack on the other hand couldn't understand what we were doing there. I was upbeat telling him we were going on a hike and an adventure, and he kept asking me if we could go to Target now. He saw lizards, ran over bridges, posed for pictures with bugs, walked on logs, saw a deer roaming free (despite the picture looking like it was caged in, it was on the outside of the cage and just happened to be walking down from the hillside near the fence), got totally dusty, gave himself a water bottle shower, played with his friends and saw tractors. Getting in the car I was proud that I hadn't let my hatred of hiking affect his experience. I said, "Wow that was so much fun getting to go on a hike with our friends! To which he responded, "Um, next time how bout I just stay in the car?"

Alas, all my hard work and he saw through to the heart of the matter. Hikes=long bug filled, dusty, sweaty walks!

*Notice that I am so silly and had flip flops on! My red polish was totally brown before the morning was over.

Let's Go Bowling!

Words cannot do justice to how much Jack loves to bowl. I have no idea where the obsession came from, but it is here and we are embracing it thanks to a free pass that allows Jack to bowl 1 free game every day this summer! We are trying to keep it to twice a week so that the bowling mystic won't wear off too quickly. He loves choosing his ball, trying to carry the ball with his fingers in the holes, rolling it down the lane and then shouting "HURRAY!" at the top of his lungs regardless of whether he knocks down 1 or 10 pins! Zack's game is improving as well (bumpers tend to help adults too ;)). I know some of these pictures are super lame, but to be honest, I love how totally lame they are. I love that every shot I tried to get of Jack his eyes are either closed or he looks like he's a gone off the deep end a bit!

28 is getting a bit too close to 30 for my taste

Jack with his Birthday Momma!



Here is a picture of the cake that Jack and Zack made for me. For weeks Jack had asked me what type of cake I wanted for my birthday...well maybe more accurately he had told me for weeks that I wanted a pink cake for my birthday. The day before I was instructed that I wanted a pink "Sally" cake. He and Zack made me this awesome birthday cake, complete with two tailpipes (thanks to Jack). So much fun!!



I instantly felt old after looking at all of the smoke from all of the candles in the picture...I guess I have to remember that it's 29 candles (times 2 people) = 58 candles

Happy 4th of July!

We had a wonderful 4th of July! Our day started with a trip over to one of our favorite parks where Jack got to be in the annual Bike Parade. He really got a kick out of being one of the big kids riding (okay so maybe more like using his feet to push) his bike. At the finish line Jack got his first medal! The rest of the day included playing in the pool, helping wash my car and Adda's car (once again, maybe more like spraying us all with the hose) and then a crazy long nap that ended at 6:45pm. Any other night we would have woken him up, but the late nap made going out to see fireworks possible. It was Jack's first time seeing fireworks,and because of our experience a few weeks ago trying to take Jack to a movie and him being terrified by how loud it was, we stayed in a parking lot a few streets back. We all lay on the hood of our car and watched a great fireworks show which Jack loved! He kept asking me if we could watch it again on Tivo (pretty much as soon as the show started). I tried to tell him to just lay back and enjoy them while they were on, but it made me think of how many times I have struggled to learn that very same lesson. Now I have to help Jack learn to be in the moment and not worry about the next step, the next task, the next stage. For now, the special moment of lying on the hood of my car wrapped up in blankets with the two loves of my life, watching fireworks, totally in the moment will be the picture that I remember in the years to come.

A No Show

So, he hasn't shown up for class since the incident. Now I feel like the bad guy for standing up to him and calling him on his rudeness. Lame.

Standing up for Myself

Having a twin sister has been wonderful. It's an experience I hope for my children (that is if it could happen without me having to be the mom to twins...). I loved growing up having a built in friend. Someone who liked the same things I did. Someone to jump all the major growing up hurdles with. That being said, there is one aspect of being a twin that hurts. Somehow being a twin makes the outside world think they have a free pass to comment and compare you to your twin in ways that no one would ever think of comparing two people on the face of the planet. Because right there next to you is a copy of what you could be like. What you would look like were you talented, beautiful, and skinny.

Growing up, I went through an extended awkward phase. I was chubby, something not uncommon among pre-adolescent girls. But I was different from other girls because I had a skinny twin sister. I vividly remember being stopped in the mall (something that happened often when we were growing up and twins were less of a common site then they are now thanks to the marvels of modern medicine). My sister and I stood there smiling at the stranger who approached my mom and my sister and me. She was asking the usual questions that people had. The best is always "oh are you twins?". We were being polite until she said, "no wait, I can tell the difference, this one is skinny and this one is fat (pointing to me)." My mom totally stuck up for me and right away told her, no I was perfect, but it couldn't erase the humiliation. I was the fat twin. End of story. Sadly, this experience was not the only one of its sort. I have been told by a stupid, stupid man to stop eating my sister's food (a joke I assume he thought funny in his mean spirited, hurtful way), and humiliated time and time again as it is pointed out for the world to hear that I am indeed fater then my sister.

Over the years, I thinned out, and grew taller and less awkward. Today I stand at 5'8" and 135 pounds, well below the normal average for my height. Still, I fight to erase the picture I have in my mind, the picture I have let strangers paint for me of myself, because I see the amazing women my sister is, who stands a few inches shorter, but 20 pounds lighter.

Tonight, at my kick boxing class, an older man came up to Dani and me and started asking if our husbands looked alike, and then if they could tell us apart. I told him yes to which he promptly responded for all the class to hear "well of course, because she is so much skinnier then you!" I was shocked, but I pasted a smile I have perfected over the years on my face and said yes. Dani was worried about me all through the class. I told her I was fine, and that I had long ago stopped letting it bother me. But, had I been alone, I'm sure the tears wouldn't have been far behind. I punched a little bit harder, having such a vivid target in my mind. All the while I kept wondering when I would have the guts to stand up for myself. I thought of my dear friend Monica, chewing out the construction worker on her daughter's behalf, and I decided tonight was my night.

Right after class, I uttered a silent prayer that I could get the words out, and I walked over to him. This is what I said,
"You know, I tried to let it go, but I decided instead of me feeling bad about myself I was going to come over here and let you know how hurtful and inappropriate your comment about me was earlier."
He looked stunned, but apologized. I told him that I expected he had no intention of hurting me, but that I needed to let him know that he did. I then wished him a good evening and left cheering big cheers for myself inside my head.

Tonight I did it. I stood up for myself and hopefully saved some young child, some "larger" twin someplace, from having the same ignorant comment made about her. The world needs to quickly remember that being a twin doesn't mean that common etiquette and kindness should be thrown out the window. I think tonight, there is one less person who believes it does.

Work Shirts

Jack has figured out that Zack dresses differently depending upon what he has to do for the day. Jack's current nemesis, the "work shirt." Practically as soon as Zack walks through the door in the evening Jack insists he go and change out of his "work shirt." Only then can he relax and know Zack's not going anywhere.

New Cars

Yesterday evening, on our way home from the park, Jack looked over at Zack and said,

"Papa, when I get bigger, I'm going to buy you a Prius"

Zack was touched by Jack's generosity until he turned to me and said,

"Momma, when I get bigger, I'm going to buy you a Porsche"

Sounds about right.

The dream life of a two year old

Jack woke up screaming and crying this morning at 6 am (thank you to Zack for being wonderful and getting up with him). When Zack went in, he told him in between sobs that his pink balloon had floated away into the sky. So sad, but at the same time, it's the first real insight into what he dreams about.

Pronounced Porsche-a

Recently we have started playing I spy with my little eye with Jack. He loves this game.

Jack: I see something with my eye that's a Porsche. (pronounced Porsche - a)
Ana: Um, is it a Porsche? (pronounced Porsche)
Jack: No Momma, it's a Porsche - a

So maybe he's missing the point of the game a little bit.

Oakland Zoo

Pepper spray in hand so that I could protect us from any escapee tiger attacks, Jack and I and our friends Maryanne and Zoe took a trip up to the Oakland Zoo. Jack thought it would be fun to practice the "loud, quiet" game that Dani and Sean taught him (a gift I promise to repay when they have children) but otherwise the kids entertained one another on the long drive up and back.


Jack was most excited to see the lions. We went back three different times to see if the lions were out, but no luck. This is a shot of him waiting patiently at the lion exhibit. I asked him to smile for the camera and he told me he was done looking at the camera, as evidenced by this shot.



Jack took a turn brushing the goats. He made sure I was either holding his hand or super close the whole time. About a year ago during a visit to Happy Hollow in San Jose Jack was charged by two goats and now has a fairly reasonable fear of goats. I was proud of him for being brave and attempting another boy - goat interaction. :)



The funniest moment was when the monkeys were making such loud noises that you could honestly hear them throughout the park. Jack turned to me and said, "Momma, turn those monkeys down!" Oh Jack, if only the tivo remote worked in real life.

A Child's Prayer

Tonight Jack said his first prayer. Jack has loved praying since he was 8 months old and used to grunt and fold his arms and keep grunting until I offered a prayer. It was a humbling experience to see how often he was prompted to pray versus how often I am normally during the day. Despite his early love of prayer, he has refused to offer a prayer until tonight. He made sure to thank Heavenly Father for his bike, his basketball hoop, Momma and Papa, and ended the prayer with a very loud AMEN!

I can't think of many things more beautiful then listening to my child pray to his Father in Heaven. I am grateful for that moment tonight and how easily his simple prayer brought the Spirit to our home.

Adda, Look what I can do!

Dani hates feet. She holds me responsible, blaming waking up with my feet in her face a few too many times as children. Only Jack can get away with putting his feet anywhere near her without her getting totally grossed out.

I walked into the room the other day to find this:



I ran and grabbed my camera and told him to hold still so we could gross Adda out! :)

Jack's chocolate factory

As I have mentioned before, Jack loves to play going to work. Today he let me in on his work world a little bit more. Turns out they make chocolate gold coins at his work. That's why he comes back from work with chocolate for me.

*Side note: this work and chocolate relationship that my child has picked up on is because I am addicted to chocolate. Hershey's milk chocolate to be exact. So much so that Zack keeps chocolate at his work and brings me home three kisses each day so there is no chance of me eating the whole bag in one sitting. I think in Jack's mind that must be what Zack does at work. He leaves, goes to work, and then comes home with chocolate. Makes sense.

A Belt is a Belt is a Belt...right?

This evening Jack came up to me and, prompted by Zack I am sure, said:

"Momma, don't put my belt on me like a girl."

Was anyone else aware that girls and boys wear their belts differently? Girls loop it one direction, boys loop it through the other. Where is the sanity in that? Somehow I seriously doubt that a mother came up with that idea.

Who or What is a Bongo?

Jack loves Bongo. He loves to eat Bongo. He loves to play Bongo. He loves to throw Bongo. Bongo is a friend that he has to drive to work (well Bongo drives, but Jack parks). Bongo is a tree, a car, a person, an animate object, and inanimate object. It appears Bongo is anything Jack wants it to be. The bottom line is, I may not be able to pinpoint exactly who or what Bongo is, but today, Bongo is part of the family.

Blessings

I am taking a cue from Ie Li's last post and instead of sitting here feeling sorry for myself over a little spat with a friend I am going to count my blessings. Since this is my attempt at remembering the "heart" of our life I will try to record my blessings as well from time to time.

I have been blessed beyond all deserved blessing to have found the love of my life at 15. I have been blessed to get to grow up with him and fall more in love with him as he grows as a husband and a father.

I have been blessed with the most kind and loving child. He teaches me each day to love life and to love like it's never going to hurt.

I have been blessed with a family that love me and remind me who I am, especially when I forget.

I am truly, truly blessed.

Mother's Book Club Drop Out

That's right. I'm out. I just have to read this last book and host this month's meeting (how on earth do I get myself into these things) and then I'm officially a mother's book club drop out. Hurray!

Why am I so excited to be a mother's book club drop out? Not because I think I know everything there is to know about being a mother, or because I have it all under control, but because I am so busy trying to fit in reading yet another book about mothering for this club that I am thinking up ways to avoid actually mothering my child. In my head: "Maybe if I can put Jack in front of the tv for just one more half hour program I can catch up with this month's reading and not look like a total lame-o showing up at our meeting tomorrow on page 24." Sorry ladies, that's when I have to call it quits.

So, Jack if you are reading this years from now, I'm sorry I didn't learn as much as I could have about how to raise you -- but if it is any consolidation, know that we are having a great time making it up as we go!

Momma, let's talk

Today, after preschool,(we do a mommy and me preschool with a few friends once a week) Jack and I went to the park and soon after we got there he told me it was time to go to work. (Jack's new favorite game is to pretend he has to go to work like Zack.) He waves to me, says "oh I can't forget my lunch" and then starts walking off somewhere on his own. I followed him and learned more about his work. First off, there is plenty of chocolate there :). There is a basketball hoop, but no paper. Bongo drives him to work in the morning (more about Bongo soon) but Jack has to park the car for Bongo outside the office. He told me that he spends most of his day doing his email (which involves crayons). After work, I took him to get a bagel and cream cheese. This is one of my most favorite things to do with Jack. He gets the same thing every time (mini cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese, not toasted) and then we go and sit at one of the tables outside. We sit together and talk. We talk about the weather, his friends, what we like, what we don't like. We talk about Papa, cars, birds, cars, the other people who must be hungry and need a bagel too, cars and more cars. In these moments I see how quickly he is growing up.

Today I was tired and when Jack was almost done with his bagel I told him to take the rest and we would start our walk back to the car. He stood up and said, "Momma, let's sit together and talk." That quickly, he brought me back to the moment and I was no longer thinking about how long it would take me to get him to the car, how hard it would be to carry him upstairs or to convince him to walk up them by himself and instead I sat down and talked to my two, going on 10 year old.

Momma, you're beautiful

At the most random moments during the day, Jack will look over at me and say, "Momma, you're beautiful." I catch myself looking in the mirror (all too often I've thrown on my gray hole filled sweatshirt that I love and refuse to throw out but acknowledge that I can only wear in private. My hair looks like a two year old has snuggled it and whatever makeup I remember putting on that morning has long since faded) and I have to stop myself from rolling my eyes and saying yeah, Jack, I'm beautiful, sarcastically. But then I remember being a little girl and knowing my mom was the most beautiful mom ever, and I quickly remember that he is only two and as fast as he is growing up, I am still so much his world. I stop myself from rolling my eyes, and feeling a bit more beautiful then I was the moment before, I hug him and tell him how much I love him instead.